You are a smart girl, realize that if he loved you like he said he did, he would act like it.
You are a beautiful girl, who deserves someone who can appreciate your beauty even when you're at your worst.
You are an ambitious girl, who needs someone who wants to join all of your adventures.
You deserve to be loved all the time, and not just when it is convenient for him.
Convenient: Adjective, fitting in well with a person's needs, activities, and plans / Involving little trouble or effort / situated so as to allow easy access to /
Waiting for a guy to grow up is going to take forever, and it's going to drain you. You can't force someone to be ready, and you shouldn't want to. Don't wait, be done waiting, the wait is never worth it in the end.
I understand the vulnerability of meeting someone who makes you question everything. You were doing just fine being a single lady. You did what you wanted, whenever you wanted to do it. You didn't have to get dressed up, you didn't have to do your makeup or hair (hell you didn't even need to shower or shave your legs), you could listen to the music as loud as you wanted, and nobody was around to judge you when you made a mess at the dinner table. You were enjoying being solo. You didn't expect picky ole you to actually like this guy. You thought you'd hangout for few days, and then you'd kick him to the curb once you realized his intermittent snoring actually drove you crazy, or the smell of old cigarettes actually made you want to vomit. But, complications arise, and you stuck around. Because maybe you thought those weren't deal breakers?
You are convenient. You have made yourself too available, the chase is gone and it became too easy for him to have you whenever he wanted. He didn't have to try to impress you anymore. He slowly started to pull away, and you continued to hold on, he learned that you would still be there. He gets the cake, and he gets to eat it (Really you can't blame him, it is pretty good cake). He has the best of both worlds, he's single but gets to come home to you when he wants.
I can't tell you to leave, I have no right to tell you how much of an idiot you are. I won't say 'I told you so'. Because we've all been there. We've all let a guy take just a little bit too much from us. I can't tell you what to do, but I can encourage. Encourage you to move on. Encourage you to say 'No' next time he texts you late at night. Encourage you to be done. Encourage you to go and sow your wild oats, trust me, there is someone else out there that likes starring at your butt (maybe like it even more).
Look in the mirror, look really hard at yourself. You act like a hard ass majority of the time, but somewhere there is the sensitive side of you. You do enjoy the thought of a guy going above and beyond for you. The idea of enjoying a glass of wine while he cooks you dinner in the other room, followed by a back massage that puts you right to sleep. You can't be the only one that gives, you can't be the only one that caters in the relationship. I get it, you want to give off this impression that you don't need a guy. That you are independent and successful all on your own. But just because a guy is a gentleman and shows you some chivalry, doesn't make you any less independent. Don't lower your standards because you think he's the hottest thing to walk this planet. Don't settle for convenient just because his butt looks cute in that uniform.
Girl, you deserve someone who looks at you and can't help but smile. Someone who thinks you look your best with bed head and teeth that aren't brushed. Someone who thinks your dance moves are sexy. Someone who thinks you should sing to them even when your not in the shower. Someone who likes all of your cooking. You deserve someone who likes you as much as I like carbs, ice cream, and alcohol (which is more than I'd like to admit). Stop settling, I promise, the right guy will come around. And it will feel like a breath of fresh air.
Girl, you deserve someone who looks at you and can't help but smile. Someone who thinks you look your best with bed head and teeth that aren't brushed. Someone who thinks your dance moves are sexy. Someone who thinks you should sing to them even when your not in the shower. Someone who likes all of your cooking. You deserve someone who likes you as much as I like carbs, ice cream, and alcohol (which is more than I'd like to admit). Stop settling, I promise, the right guy will come around. And it will feel like a breath of fresh air.
Heartbreak, you can't live here anymore
